The New Normal

I have been busy taping arrows on our office floor all day. I put up a sign on our restroom that says “one person at a time.” It only has room for one, but I want to be safe. We have masks, gloves, those crazy silver suits guys wear when using flame-throwers, and lots of Clorox wipes.

I think we are ready. Ready for the new normal. We have plexiglass shields, and a Silkwood-style decontamination shower. We have lots of thermometers.

We have an autoclave, a kiln, and we have our own blacksmithing shop (just in case). We planted a garden in the warehouse, and we have 55 gallons of water in a drum. We also have an arsenal of weaponry. RPGs, .50 cal full auto.

We have a makeshift hospital, with IV stuff, a machine that goes BING. all that equipment. We have bunk beds set up for all of us. We have camp stoves, real stoves, hammocks. slingshots. We set up snares in the parking lot to get some protein if needed.

We have radar, lidar, sonar. We got it. We have flints to make fire. We have a butter churn.

We are ready for the new normal. We have a box of Cap’n Crunch. We have a TV with a VCR built in.

Yes. Placer County has re-opened for business. The Farm is here to serve you. We are ready for the new normal.

And, just in case we don’t need all of this stuff, we have www.thefarmav.com, acclaimed as the best rep website in all of Placer County.

So, let’s hope we don’t need to churn our own butter in the new normal. Hop onto our website, log in. Enjoy the tools we created for you before the new normal takes hold.